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Engine 2 Diet

I fnally watched Forks Over Knives the other night (they did a GREAT job following The China Study,too, btw), and just realized that the Essylstyn (sp?) guy from China Study and FOK is the father of the guy who wrote Engine 2! Huh?! Thought that was pretty cool.

So, I had an idea. I ordered both the dvd and the book the other day, and it should be delivered tomorrow. Since I am having a hard time sticking to eating anything healthy past breakfast, I would follow E2 and track my progress here. One thing about myself that I have come to realize is that I can stick with something for about a month if it is something new. If I try to do something over and over again for longer than that, I get bored and quit. So, following E2 for a month should be interesting. I am also planning to start running again. Damn weather. It gets really nice (70′ & 80’s) then crawls back up into the mid 90’s! WTH! Just get cooler and stay cooler so I can run outside! I HATE running on the dreadmill! And, I do not have a gym membership where I can go do classes or anything like that (not that I actually would, anyway!).

Plan: Follow E2 and RUN my little heart out. Oh, I will work on stopping smoking, too. Yes,  my dirty little secret…

Until tomorrow! Fresh from E2! Excited! Can’t wait!

J.

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I was going to say this is the first day (again), but there have been many first days. How many first days are there going to be? Why do I start out good in the morning and the screw up by lunch? Why do I always say it is okay to eat crap in the afternoon (even though I know it isn’t)? My head knows better, but my urge always wins. I even made a soup that helps, but it didn’t today. Why can’t I be healthy? What is my issue? If I can figure that out, maybe I can finally get it under control.

This is what I have eaten so far today (and it is only 1:45pm)

Breakfast: Cottage cheese & strawberries; 2 cups of coffee (see the mornings start of GREAT!)

Noon (I won’t call it lunch because really….it isn’t): soup, chips, brownie, Reese’s miniatures

I have successfully completed one week of training! It took some time to get back into running mode, but I think I am finally there. Thank God! I am starting off really slow because it has been well over 6 months since I have run seriously. I started a program about a month ago, but let’s face it…running one day for a total of about 5 minutes doesn’t really count!

The plan I am on now doesn’t have that much more actual running time in it, but I have at least been consistent with it. It starts out the first week at walking (briskly) 4 minutes and then running for 1 minute; repeated 4 times. Next week (and the following weeks) the walk time will decrease and run time will increase until I am running a full 5k (hallelujah!).

Want some more awesome news?! I have lost 6 pounds since my last update!!! I am now at 173 (173.4 to be exact), baby! I can smell the 160’s. Although 160 is my nemesis. I have gotten down to 160 in the past, and then my body starts to turn on me. For the life of me, I can’t get under that number. Do you have one of those numbers that seems to haunt you? I haven’t been under 160 since I was pregnant with my first child 16 years ago. Back then I weighed about 135-140. I remember going to the doc while I was pregnant and them weighing me. I will never forget it. I got on the scale and for the first time in my life, she had to move the marker off of 100 and put it on 150. I remember feeling like Oh My God! After that day, I have never seen than number again.

It could be worse, though. When I was married to my kids’ dad (and very unhappy) I topped the scale at 235(!). That is a LOT for my 5’4.5 frame. Hell, that’s a lot for anyone’s frame unless you’re a heavyweight boxer! So, when I look at it that way, I have really come a long ways. And I can’t wait to go even further!

Good days are coming! I can feel it!!! Open-mouthed smile

Don’t eat…go study!

Have I mentioned that I am a student? Yup. A 33 (soon to be 34) year old student. I had my babies at a very young age. Some would say that even I was a baby when I had them. Looking back now that I am in my 30’s, I was a baby when I had them. My first one came a month before I turned 18, the 2nd one at 19, and the third at 21. So, needless to say, my life took a detour when it should have been on the road to college, and a career, and everything else fabulous. But, I am happy with the way my life has turned out.

True, I may be going to school while other people my age are climbing to the top of the ladder while I haven’t even come close to the first rung, but all in all, my life is great. My kids are super smart and talented, and given the odds, it could have been a lot worse!

Anyway, I came in here because I have an assignment due today that I am sooooo not wanting to do right now. I will be screwed tonight when I am struggling to complete it.

Ya know, it is hard to stay home and go to school all the while I am trying to lose weight. It is easy to put off what I should be doing and instead do something I want to do – like EAT, watch TV, EAT, surf the net, EAT, read my daily blogs, EAT. Curse my days filled with long hours and no one to supervise me! On the bright side, it is almost lunch time! I can satisfy my belly then come back in here instead of munching away on random crap.

I have a weigh-in coming up on Monday. I have officially set Monday as my weigh-in days, and I am going to also set a goal for myself to lose 1-2 pounds per week. Later, I will also set a goal to do cardio 3x’s a week…later. Finally, I will add in strength training as well. Dear God, why do I have to hate exercise so much?

Hope you have a fabulous and skinny weekend!

Lots of love!

J.

I had a mini binge today. I ate a healthy lunch and breakfast, but was still hungry after lunch. I started with a few Wheat Thins, then some lime flavored tortilla chips, and ended with some pretzels. Thank God I don’t buy my crap trigger foods anymore. That has been my saving grace on more than one occasion including today.

 

Took the dogs for a 1-mile 20-minute walk. I burned about 100 calories. It is not a lot, but it helps. To help make up for my binge besides taking a walk, I am going to skip rice with my dinner, and forgo my banana/pb snack tonight. Hopefully, all that will counterbalance. The walk plus adjusting my food gives me an extra 300 calories. Hopefully my binge wasn’t too much over that. :/

What should I do when I am bored? Normally, I would turn on the TV, and settle in with a bag of chips or something equally as delicious. But, I am determined to not fall off the wagon. I am tried of being fat, and I can’t continue with my old patterns.

So, what should I do instead? I am very sleepy, but do not want to take a nap. For one thing, I have a really hard time sleeping during the day (unless I am passed out from a carb overdose), and I don’t want to have trouble falling asleep tonight.

It’s a nice day out – I could take the dogs for a walk, but I have no energy, and they act like wild idiots when I get the leashes out. I don’t have the patience for that right now.

I am concentrating on how well I have eaten today, and trying really hard to not sabotage it all! Here is what my day has looked like so far:

Breakfast:

Oatmeal with blueberries and flaxseed

Coffee

Lunch:

Wrap with baked tofu and cooked spinach

Cauliflower and sweet potato chowder (very good, and less than 100 cals per serving. Score!)

Sugar-free vanilla pudding cup

(Planned dinner):

Meatless balls with BBQ on whole wheat bun

Roasted asparagus and carrots

Pickles

Snacks:

Apple with peanut butter

Fat-free carrot raisin muffin

 

Just for fun, let’s see how many servings of fruit/veg I had today:

blueberries

spinach

soup

asparagus and carrots

apple

OK, that is 5. I suppose that is the recommended amount, but it would be nice if it were more. But, with everything that I have already eaten and have planned to eat, I have already met my calorie limit. Today’s limit per SparkPeople, is a little over 1200.

I am going to see if this new higher calorie limit will help me with weight loss. Previously, I was staying under 1000. I lost weight for the first couple of days and then it stopped. I don’t think I was eating enough. Fingers crossed I will find the magic number! Smile 

 

I sat down to draft a post as a way of preventing bad eating choices. While I don’t think the craving has completely passed, I am done for now!

A promise to myself.

So it has been awhile, and I have fallen off the wagon. So goes my life. I don’t lose as much as I would like when I am restricting calories, but I don’t get discouraged. I splurge on or two days and then fall completely off.

Today started out great, and then after lunch it all went downhill, as usual. To back up just a bit – yesterday was horrid! I promised myself last that I would start fresh and new today. Get back to good eating habits. No added fat or sugar. Nothing too processed – mostly whole, nutritious foods. I really had good intentions. But, I ate lunch today while watching TV (btw, this is a HUGE trigger for me), and then continued to munch and raid the kitchen like a crack addict in search for another hit. Literally. Sometimes I feel like an addict.

I went shopping today. I hate shopping. I found a pair of jeans that are sill the same size. This is a good thing, because I thought I might have to go up a size. Perhaps they fit because they are a little stretchy. Whatever, I’ll take it. The problem is finding tops that don’t highlight all my rolls, lumps, and bumps, but still look cute. The cute tops were either too tight, or too large. You see, I am still kinda too big to wear clothes from the normal lady section, but the plus size is too big. Sigh. I finally decided on a cami with a sweater type jacket thing to go over it, a print tee with a different type of sweater thing, and this pair of jeans. Just FYI – the Lauren Conrad brand of clothes at Kohl’s are really cute! I am not a Lauren Conrad fan, but I am really digging her clothing line!

Anyway, I need to remember the reasons I want to lose weight. And yes, a big part of it is for vanity’s sake. I want to look good. But more than that, I want to feel good. I want to be comfortable in my skin. I don’t want to think about my weight constantly. I want to be able to run again. I want to feel proud of myself. I want to be able to pick anything off the rack and it look good. I want my husband to feel proud to have me on his arm (he tells me he is, but honestly, what man is happy with a fat wife?!).

So, to my friends and my blog, I am making a promise right now to not give up. I know that I will probably fall off the wagon many more times, but I will keep getting back on until one day, I don’t even realize I am on a wagon anymore. I will start exercising starting tomorrow (I really don’t have time today anymore. I did earlier, but now I don’t). I will stop eating while watching TV. In fact, I will stop watching so much TV. After all, I am wasting so much time sitting on my ass. I need to live.